I had jotted down, as I always do, a trickle of thought, one I wanted to capture. I wrote ‘I love the quiet people’. and there is more to write on that. However, inside my ongoing of a day of preparation and my departure from my beloved island on transit to another beloved place which currently is racking up 40 degrees, I confess to Q. Questions for others, for myself. The facing of the awful Q through check-in, security, passport control. So I decide to find Q in my trusty and ancient Thesaurus. I find Quiddity. It’s an old word, you will know. Not one that finds a place in ordinary conversation, but one that intrigues me for its meaning.
Quiddity is the ‘whatness’ or ‘Who-ness’ which makes something or someone distinguished from others, the universal nature of that thing ‘person’ including personal quirks and eccentricities. I know why Q came to me today. And in the Thesaurus, it is Section 1. Existence. I have never, in decades of writing ever been wheeched back to Section 1. But as I read down the lines of the first page on Abstract Relations, I feel I have landed. I am Q. So is everyone but most of us don’t get that, until we do.
Packing for Africa whilst I shiver under a fast shower and out, is extremely tricky. Shorts, skimpy frox, teeshirts I have completely forgotton about and which give me some grief as I pull them from hibernation, all laid low right now, swacked and contained. I know I travel as myself. My case is not full of the ‘right’ clothes. It never was but, in saying that, even as I held fast to the that of that, I still died a thousand deaths in my youth. I never looked as they did. I was a Q although I didn’t know that, and didn’t want that. I wanted to be any other letter of the alphabet, whatever got me into the inner halls of Them. I know different now. When you are a Q, you learn to be one. It’s lonely as hell. It’s dark and unfriended. But if you want to be who you want to be, Own the Q and find support. You’re a Q. You know the way.
Talk soon from the Spring of Africa, among the Quiet people.
Oh the joy of returning to your beloved Africa Stu and Stacey. Please soak up some Africaness for me.
Have the best time although I definitely don’t envy you the heat.
❤️